Episode 348: How To Discover Your Singing Strengths and Stay True To Yourself
Have you ever wished that you knew how your voice was unique or wanted to discover your singing strengths?
You want to sound like you, but it's so frustrating when you don't even know if it sounds good.
Today I have one of the singers that I work with in 1:1 lessons, Kelly Maglia, and she is going to share her journey through this exact thing. We are going to show you how you can discover your singing strengths and stay true to yourself!
Links
Subscribe To The Podcast Here on Apple Podcasts
Follow The Podcast Here on Spotify
Key Takeaways from This Episode:
- How to blend your natural vocal abilities with the type of music that you like to sing.
- Navigating the pressure of feeling like you need to sound a certain way.
- Infusing your personality into your voice and YOURSELF as a musical artist.
- Staying true to yourself as you choose opportunities that will be the best fit for YOU.
- How to embrace how your voice is different.
- Choosing the feedback that you want to focus on.
About Kelly
Kelly Maglia began life as a classical singer — though secretly, she always wanted to sing hard rock! 
But after numerous voice teachers in college told her she’d ruin her voice if she dared leave the world of classical music, Kelly decided to ignore them and follow her passion anyway. 
As a life-long lover of hard rock and 80s glam metal, Kelly developed her vocal style first by imitating her heroes - Ann Wilson of Heart, Sebastian Bach of Skid Row, and Pat Benatar. But as time wore on, she missed singing in a classical style — and so began her mission to combine hard rock and opera. Working with Tiffany VanBoxtel has made that dream a reality, and they have collaborated to develop Kelly’s signature “ropera” style!
Kelly has written and performed her own original music (which is modern glam metal, of course!), but she also loves to put her own unique spin on cover songs. She is also a pole dancer, acrobat, and costume designer, and you can see her put all of these loves together in her music videos. Check ‘em out on YouTube here: https://bit.ly/3l6Q1fY
Full Transcript
Have you ever wished that you knew how your voice was unique, or you wanted to discover your own singing strengths, but maybe you're just too focused on how, like, do I even sound good? You want to sound like you, but it gets so frustrating when you don't even know if it sounds good. Today, I have one of the singers that I work with one on one on the podcast, and we're going to share her journey on this exact thing.
And we're going to show you how you can discover your singing strengths and stay true to yourself as a singer. Welcome to the Star Singer Podcast. Taking singers from overthinking and overwhelmed to loving your voice. Yourself and the way that you sing. I'm Tiffany van Bokstel and in the last 17 years, I've taught one on one lessons to as many as 50 singers a week.
That's thousands of voice lessons. And I'm so excited to share what works with you because singing is simple. You're just over complicating it. So let's get started.
All right. I am so excited to be here with Kelly Maglia and. She is one of, honestly, like my favorite people to work with right now. We're doing so many cool things. Um, we've been doing voice lessons together for a while, and I wanted to have her on the show to share some inspiring things and like, let you know, like, what is possible for you as a singer, as an artist, and I think that hearing other people's journey makes it more doable for you too.
So Kelly, thank you for being here.
Thank you for having me, Tiffany. I just want to say that I love working with you so much. I've worked through with a lot of voice teachers, including going all the way back to high school and college, and you have been the most fun and the one that I worked with the longest.
So I really appreciate that so much.
That's awesome. Thank you. Um, can you tell me a little bit about yourself? And this is gonna be, I think this is gonna be new for me too. I'd love to hear how you got started singing.
Yeah. So I started singing in the choir in junior high and I just loved it. Um, and I would say that I really started doing, started singing, um, Pop, but mostly classical in high school because my voice just naturally kind of did that.
I found my head voice right away and it wasn't until I started doing musical theater probably towards the end of high school that I had to figure out what is my chest voice. and how can I belt because I had to for auditions or whatever else. And that was really funny. At this point, I was studying with a voice teacher, but she was strictly classical.
So I stuck with my classical lessons and accidentally found my chest voice and it felt really liberating. And, but at the same time, I still very much identified as a classical singer. Um, and. That really has kind of carried into my career now. So I spent time studying classical. I did major in music in college.
Um, and so I have a bachelor's degree in music and the entire program was classical music. So that was great, but I knew I didn't want to be an opera singer. very early on. Uh, but for a while I wasn't sure where I was going to go. It was going to be musical theater or what I gave up singing for a while, focused on starting a business.
And then it just really hit me one day that I really wanted to sing hard rock because I'd always admired hard rock artists, especially Ann Wilson of heart. She was always my favorite. And, but I just thought, I can't do that. I don't have that kind of voice. Like how in the world am I going to sing? And I just started experimenting with it, but it was, it was difficult.
I'm not going to lie because the default setting is the classical sound. So I did train with a teacher shortly after that kind of revelation. I started training with a teacher who taught more pop. Technique and that was helpful. She, she was able to get me in touch with, um, how to add grit and distortion to my voice, which was cool in a safe way.
I, that really was helpful, but there were limits to her as well, in terms of her awareness of technique. What I really need to learn needed to learn in order to sing the type of music that I want to sing was mixed voice. And she didn't really know how to teach that. So that became something that I ended up kind of discovering again, accidentally during the pandemic, I would say is really when it really hit for me.
And then I kind of learned how to add grit to that, but then I discovered Tiffany and then we were able to take that even further. further, like deliberately consciously deciding when we're going to use a mixed voice versus a chest voice or a belt, or when I'm going to just put opera into the mix, which is always something I wanted to do, but I, that was very discouraged by especially the pop teacher that I worked with.
And, um, I was so happy when Tiffany and I started working together because she has a background in, you know, classical as well. So we were able to take this, my base or home base in classical music and then the more recent experience with rock music and fuse them together.
Oh, that's, that's so awesome. Um, I, I really, um, can empathize with like the pressure of.
Or feeling the pressure of, like, sounding a certain way. And, you know, having a more classical voice, I mean, I am classically trained, I sing musical theater, also, and jazz, and classic country sounds really good in my voice, but that's, like, taken a while to, like, develop, like, what my voice is, and I think that in our culture, there's such a pressure to, like, belt.
And to sound a certain way. Yes. Um, how are, how has that been something that you've encountered in your life and what have you done to like,
That is a great question, Tiffany, because I'm not a hundred percent sure that I have overcome it yet, because as you know, in our weekly lessons, we always have this moment where it's like, am I going to build that note or am I going to use mixed voice?
And I know you're a big advocate of mixed voice for so many reasons for, for me. Control for longevity of the voice, all of that. And I understand that, but I still have in my mind that it needs to sound big and belty and mostly because of the singers that I grew up admiring, like Ann Wilson and Whitney Houston that had these big voices.
Although what I figured out. Lately, especially in studying with you, Tiffany, is that they were using a lot of more mix than I realized at the time. You know, when you hear them, it sounds so powerful and full and chesty, but it isn't, it actually, in some instances is not what it sounds like, that they are actually being able to incorporate a mixed voice.
But to answer your question, I do, although lately, I think, you know, there's been a trend away from it in pop music with like Billie Eilish and Olivia Rodrigo. And so like, they are going for these, um, softer voices, more head voice, like the belty big belty singer is not in fashion in pop music right now, but in rock and roll, it is everything.
And it is a little bit of a Cardinal sin in rock and roll. If you sound too pretty. Unless you're doing what you and I are doing, which is throwing the opera in in certain places and deliberately making it sound like opera within the context of a rock song, then that's fine. But like the difficulty I have is when we're singing a big rock song or I'm covering like a heart tune or whatever.
I want it to sound belty. And sometimes that's in conflict with what might be the best thing for my voice or for, you know, longevity or for even pitch accuracy. Like we've been talking about a lot. So sometimes if you're trying to push that belt too high, the pitch suffers as a result and it can be too much strain on the voice.
And so, but I have to get over the path in my head that I need to be able to belt that note, you know?
Well, and especially when, you know, singers have voices that are as versatile as yours, you know, you can belt it, you can sing it in head voice, you can mix it. And so there are all of these choices. That you get to make, which is really awesome, and it makes learning the technique, you know, a lot more challenging, you know, taking it to the next level, and all of that kind of stuff.
Um, but tell me about how this, this awareness, this self discovery, has helped you feel comfortable within the genre that you're in right now. Like, kind of almost creating this. Subgenre. Like, tell me a little bit about
that. The subgenre. I love it. So, I'm going to give Tiffany complete credit for this because you came up with this one day probably, I don't know, a year or two ago in our lessons and you said, you know, what you do is rapera.
And that is so true. That is what we're trying to blend together. And when I say rock opera, what I, I don't mean like, I'll sing an opera over here, like a lot of symphonic metal singers will do. They'll sing in a classical voice over this very heavy music. I'm not doing that. And I'm not just doing rock.
We blend them together in the same song. So we've been working on, you know, throwing in. Operatic runs like there's a version I do of Barracuda that at the heart Barracuda by heart for anybody who doesn't know Um, it's there's a version that I do where at the very end the outro I do this almost like a cadenza kind of thing that we worked on together It's definitely pure opera there.
Um, and we do that on purpose right because that's what i'm trying to do as an artist Um, but now I lost the thread of the question I went off on that
That's okay. That's, that's basically it. You know, I wanted to hear more about your, about what you're, what you're trying to do as an artist. And, you know, if you're, you're listening to the podcast, so, you know, maybe check out Kelly's website or, you know, whatever resources she gives, but, you know, Kelly has blue hair, you know, she is like exotic and beautiful.
And she is like singing. Rock I mean she looks like a glam metal singer right and then you know She designs clothing like corsets and stuff like that. And so it really has this sort of like Renaissance and like a nod to the Renaissance so and and like classical Baroque So like putting in these operatic things like not only But her voice, but her personality and her brand and can you tell me about any of the, you know, challenges that you face like just continuing to be comfortable, bringing that out and not caring what other people think, especially as.
You get so many opportunities that look so different and staying true to yourself.
That is a great question. And yeah, it is. I think that is the name of the game is being able to stick to who you are as an artist, regardless of what other people think, or if they think you're crazy, because I have had, you know, mostly I've gotten really good feedback when, when I do perform, um, in this, you know, style of opera.
It usually goes over well, but I have had instances where I've been asked to sing in a certain way or asked to mimic the original artist. And I have to say, even though I know there's a whole industry around that, like people doing cover bands. And that's great. And that's a wonderful avenue for people who want to pursue that.
I have found that in being asked to do that, I started to diminish myself, you know, when I've asked been asked to sing covers, but to please mimic the original artist, it, it felt so confining to me. And so like, I'm, Yeah, I could probably manage to mimic the original artist. I probably could, but where, what path is this leading me down?
And how, how much am I going to beat down what's dying to come out inside of me, which is me. It's taken me years to get here. But, and one of the things I love that you teach Tiffany is about loving your own voice. How many years did I spend hating my voice? Because I didn't think it sounded like Ann Wilson enough or Whitney Houston enough.
And instead what we've been doing in our lessons is working on embracing what Kelly Maglia sounds like and not worrying about trying to sound like anybody else. And it's almost like I don't even want that assignment anymore or ever again because it feels Almost damaging. It feels like it's working at cross purposes to Who I am becoming as an artist and how much i'm embracing what I sound like
Yeah, the voice is just unlike any other instrument because it's literally us it's coming out of us and so When you are doing something that isn't true to yourself You Or your goals, you know, as you stated and, you know, there's a lot of sacrifice in, in any industry, you know, it's like, oh, okay, I want to be a movie star, so I'm going to go to L.
A. and audition and I'm going to wait tables and I hate waiting tables, but I'm going to do it because I'm going to audition and, and, you know, there is a practical side to it, but it's like, at what point, you know, Do people decide like, hey, I'm doing this for me. And at what point do people decide that, hey, this is what my voice sounds like.
Like, this is, this is the thing that I can do that's different.
Right. This
is how my voice is really cool. Exactly.
So
tell us about how you kind of started to discover your voice a little bit more and appreciate it for what it is and how that reflects like who you are as a person and as an artist.
Yeah, I love that question.
You know, well, there's a couple ways. I mean, obviously working with you, Tiffany has been great because from the beginning you've been about embracing. And I will also say it's funny that you mentioned my clothing line because I really do believe that in some ways that has been the inspiration. I've always been drawn to, uh, Baroque Renaissance, you know, even Victorian, like just costuming from the past, big opulent dresses.
And so even though I'm a, I also design in kind of a glam rock style, I always bring that like, That sensibility of like a Baroque or Renaissance or something, you know, whatever I'm feeling that day into my clothing line and into my music videos, you'll see it very clearly in the music videos that I've made both covers and my original music.
And because I love that so much, I remember there was a moment that started happening during the pandemic because we were all home with nothing else to do. So I had a lot of time to really start thinking about who I was as an artist. And I'm looking at my clothing that I'm designing and the costumes that I have in my music.
videos and they're this big opulent. There's one of my music videos. I'm wearing this like dark queen costume that I designed. That's very Renaissance looking. And I thought, wait a minute. So the visual is looking old fashioned, but also edgy and rock at the same time. Why am I not combining these things?
Like I look, I'm, I look exactly like I should be singing rock and opera, you know? And then it's so during the pandemic, I started going, Oh my goodness. What if I could do that? But I didn't have enough confidence really yet with it. I had studied classical, like I said, and I had a classical teacher prior to you, Tiffany, prior to the, she stopped teaching during the pandemic, but so, but we had really pretty much just done.
Um, A lot of classical stuff. It was the mix of the two things that I really, really wanted to do. And I think just looking at my own image and going, what are you doing? Like you need to bring these two things together and then working with you just really sealed the deal with that.
That's so awesome.
That's really cool. I can't, I still like, can't even believe like how perfect it is because it's like that inspiration, like the way that your voice is, like your voice is perfect to sing like opera plus rock and opera and that's so cool how that worked out. It's just really, really awesome. Um, yeah, it's
fun.
I love it.
There's a ton of singers. Trying to discover their own voice, trying to sound like their favorite artist, just wondering if they have what it takes, and then disappointed and just giving up before they even start because they don't sound like them. Like their favorite artists like what it what is your advice to them?
Well, you know, I do think when you're starting out I think it's kind of natural to start start by copying I mean, I think you know with anything like when you learn to walk or ride a bike You know somebody tells you how to do it You got to do this or when you're learning to walk you're copying your parents or they're helping you do it So in the beginning, I don't think think it's such a problem.
And it is kind of how we develop our own tastes. The thing that really excites you about another singer is something that you're probably going to copy even unconsciously initially. But I do think that there comes a point where once you kind of got that or people, it was funny, even though I didn't think that I was like, A rock singer, always still defaulted to opera.
The number of people who told me, especially early on, when I started recording my original music, you sound like Anne Wilson of heart. It was funny to me because I don't think I sound like Anne Wilson of heart, but I always wanted to sound like Anne Wilson. So that was both a compliment, but also again, during the pandemic, I started to think that's so wonderful that people are saying that I sound like my idol.
Cause she is like, I fall down at her feet still. But at the same time, I thought. But do I want to sound like Ann Wilson or do I want to sound like Kelly Maglia? And that's been a journey because there's so much pressure sometimes, especially if you sing cover songs there and you perform those live, there can be pressure to sound like the original artist, but more and more and more.
I, and I think I'm still in this process of figuring out or, or I don't want to say figuring out, allowing my voice. Who I am to become dominant and not worrying so much about copying other people.
Yeah, that's, that's really awesome. What's, uh, I'm curious what's more challenging for you. I guess it's kind of a personal question.
And I Work with enough singers to maybe anticipate the answer, but I don't want to I want to I want to hear what you are thinking is it more challenging to Well, and this might have changed For you. Is it more challenging to get feedback from yourself or feedback from others? And and if you know, it's a horse apiece then like is there any specific?
Times where it is more challenging verse when it isn't Because feedback is something all singers deal with and it's always going to be there.
Yes, okay. Well feedback not all feedback is created equal, right? So I think when feedback is constructive Like your feedback, right? Like when we're in a lesson, you're giving me feedback and you're saying, okay, what I heard was this, and I know you want, I heard X, you want Y, how do we get to Y?
And we're troubleshooting in the lesson and we're figuring it out, right? That is constructive feedback. There's other feedback that people give you that is vague. I've had this happen vague. Oh, it's, it's okay. It's good. Um, uh, can you try something out that works? Uh, can you, I don't know, you're not really sounding like the singer, but I don't know if I want you to sound like that, you know, feedback like that where it's vague and you don't, it's not actionable.
Somebody's not saying, okay, In this measure, maybe try this, you know, that's actionable feedback. And that's something that you can actually do and work on when somebody's giving you feedback, that's vague, or it feels like it's accusatory in some way, or, or it's, or it's questioning. Your value or, or work ethic or any of those things, that feedback is not helpful.
I think, you know, I think especially if you're already a naturally motivated person, like I am, I'm, I'm willing to do the work, but I need to know what the work is and people who give feedback that don't understand singing or don't know how to. Help you achieve your goal. The feedback can feel demoralizing and deflating because it's not constructive.
It's not giving you something to work on. So having said that I love constructive feedback. I welcome it. I want it. I take it on board and we work with it. If it's not constructive, these days I'm more and more and more come inclined to just throw it in the trash because I recognize that it's coming from a person who either doesn't know what they're talking about or doesn't know how to give feedback or just doesn't like how you sound and you're just going to have to agree to disagree on that.
Now, my own feedback, I am my own worst critic, so I still have trouble listening to my voice. I do do it when I go in the studio, but I'm still plagued and you know, Tiffany, you and I are working on this. I'm still plagued by, oh, it doesn't quite sound the way I want it to sound. And I know you have a program that's, that's there to kind of help deal with that.
So I think I need to jump into that program in addition, in addition to doing our weekly lessons, because that is still a thing, that I am still my own worst critic, even if A hundred other people in the audience love what I just did. If I don't love it, it kind of doesn't matter. And that's still something that I'm working on.
Wow, it takes me so long to push the unmute button. Yeah, I, I definitely get that. And I think it's very, it's very easy. Um, I think the program you're talking about is the Love Your Voice program. It's like 20 ways to love your voice. And what I do love about it is that it's, it It's distracting in a good way.
And it kind of, you're focusing on a specific task. Like one of the tasks is, you know, when you're singing. Okay, I'm gonna sing today and any feedback that I get that comes to myself. I'm gonna talk to the hand like nope I'm not listening to it today. Nope. Nope. Nope, right and that's my assignment, you know and as long as I complete that assignment like the practice for the day would have been done because I could be getting all this feedback from myself and just stop singing, you know, stop the practice session and just not even sing.
Whereas, you know, if I can silence it for a second, I mean, that is a skill. You know, that's a skill because I can't be giving myself feedback during a performance. There's so many things happening. That's right.
Yeah, and then you're not really performing the song. You're not emoting, tapping into the emotions.
You're stuck in your head. And that's, nobody wants to watch that for sure.
Right, right. And so a lot of the tactics are about, you know, and we do some of this stuff in our lessons too, where we're focusing on other things, you know, and If you're only focusing on how you sound all the time, it's so limiting because that's your only, if that's your only measure of success, then, and especially, I think everybody in, in my world, or, you know, if you're listening to the podcast or if you're working with me, like you're, you're probably, you're, you know, hard on yourself, you know, you're growth minded, you're dedicated.
Yeah.
And. It's, it's hard because we're always growing and we're always changing and wanting to grow and sometimes it's just not the way to focus on the sound. It might be focusing on, hell yeah, like, I practiced four days this week and I went in with goals. And I, I did it and I'm just really proud of myself.
Yes
I do think that's a great point and i've heard you say that on another podcast episodes I do think we have to pat ourselves on the back uh for showing up to the practice because When you show up to practice it does show that you that you do have a growth mindset that you're not stuck in this idea That i'm either talented or i'm not i'm either good at this or i'm not which I think is another way that Singers or any creatives can sabotage themselves and I used to fall into that category too that I would Define myself as either I'm talented or I'm not and then as soon as I'd make a mistake It would go from oh, I'm talented to I'm not that actually has nothing to do with it.
It's all about Diligence setting goals problem solving when you're not meeting the goals But then also, like you're saying, not just focusing on the problems and solving the problems, but also focusing on what you love about your voice. Because, uh, last I heard we all started singing because it's fun, and it's easy to just take the fun completely out of it when you are trying so hard to be a better singer.
So, I really think you need both. You need, you need the discipline and the, um, discipline. The growth mindset of being able to say, okay, there's X problem I'm hearing. What is the solution? Okay. Find the solution. That's part a, and then part B is really just being able to sink into it and say, and just love to sing because at the end of the day, when you perform, that is what the audience is tapping into.
Half the time they don't know if you made a mistake. They don't know if you're flat most people who are not musicians. Let me say that They often will not know if your pitch is not accurate They will not know if you made a mistake or even flubbed a lyric Well, what they will know is that they're bored watching you if you are not completely loving your performance and sold on what you're doing So I think that that is The most important thing.
Yeah, and I love how you touched on a little bit about Like Well, you touched on something that reminded me of we also need to learn how to highlight ourselves and how we're different because it's like when I think about that, especially in the case of you, what you've learned to highlight is how you actually stand out and how your brand actually like is and who you are as an artist.
Right.
Exactly.
So that's, that's amazing. Um, do you have any. Advice for singers who might be caught in the trap of, like, doubting themselves, or wondering if they have what it takes, or, you know, getting unsolicited feedback, or just, you know, hearing, hearing their own voice in their head, um,
Oh, so many things.
Yeah, give us some advice. Okay, so I would say, the first thing is, Don't ever lose sight of the fun, you know, we, we all started singing because we love it and we love music and it's fun. That's got to stay. Number one. Otherwise you, you could be tempted to give up along the way. If you lose the fun. The second thing I would say is what I touched on a little bit earlier is like really adopting a growth mindset.
So, um, there's a couple of books out there. There's one called mindset and the other one called the talent code, which I would really recommend both of those books. They really, they're not just talking about, um. Music. I mean, they're talking about all sorts of skills that people can learn to develop.
Those books really helped me understand what a growth mindset is versus a fixed mindset. And I'm taking that directly from the book mindset by Carol Dweck. I highly recommend these books because what they teach you is that it's not something that you're just born with. Sometimes. Yeah, you might, like you said, in a recent podcast, sometimes, you know, somebody comes out of the woman, woman.
They just know how to do it. And you have prodigies. Um, I still would maintain that we don't know what's going on in these, like, let's see the little child prodigy's mind. We don't know that they might have come out of the womb able to do it because there was nothing obstructing it. Meaning there was no parent criticizing them, teacher criticizing them.
I mean, I don't know. This is just speculation on my part. Having not been a child prodigy. This is just speculation on my part that I do think that what makes somebody successful is the ability to know that they can do it. Even when difficulties arise, they know they can overcome those difficulties. And so that's, I think the formula for success, but what gets in the way of that a lot of times is that we have people around us, parents or friends or teachers saying things that are mean and rude and kind of disrupt that thought pattern.
So one thing that I had to spend a lot of time doing also was kind of unpacking the very early messages I got about my singing, you know, from my dad who, who meant well, but. Did not know how to teach. He's a musician himself and did not know how to nurture me through this process. And so I had to go through and kind of unlearn some of that negative programming that I got from him.
That made me feel like I'm not good enough, you know, and this is no diss on my dad. I love my dad. He and I are super close, but it's just, you know, it's hard to be a parent, man. So it's like, so my point is, I would say. It's understanding that you can achieve whatever you set out to achieve if you decide that you can.
But usually what gets in the way of that is you have some negative programming from a parent or a teacher, whatever usually developed early in childhood that's going to get in the way of that. So the sooner you become aware of that and kind of release that, that's the only thing holding you back ever is that now, as far as taking feedback, it's a lot of what I said a lot of times that feedback that you get is going to mirror.
The, the, the deepest fears that you already have. And I think that's just kind of nature's way of, of holding up a mirror to you and saying, This is how you feel about yourself. Are you sure you want to continue to feel this way? And until you recognize that, sometimes it has to get so bad and you have to have something smack you in the face so hard for you to go, actually, no.
I do not agree with this feedback anymore. I recognize that it is just mirroring back to me my absolute worst fears and I don't have to accept this. And the only feedback that I'm going to take is feedback that helps me get to where I want to go. IE, you know, doing voice lessons with you, Tiffany, that's the feedback I'll take if anybody wants to, has a problem with what I'm doing, you know, or how my voice sounds, I've decided now that that's a them problem.
Okay. I have to like my voice and I have to like what I'm doing and the rest of it doesn't matter.
Yeah, I love, I love that. It's so awesome. This, this sad thing about a lot of singers is that like, it's, it's like when you step into the practice room, almost like use a clarinet as an, as an example, I like.
I like, oh gosh, like clarinets are beautiful instruments, but man, they sound terrible when
they first start. Oh, I know. I played clarinet for seven years, so I know. I was in the band in junior high. Oh my gosh, I didn't know that. That's hilarious that you brought that up. Yes. It sounds really bad at first.
Yeah.
I mean, if I were to blow on a clarinet right now, it would also sound really bad. It's like until you, until you know how to do it, you know, it's going to honk and honk and squeak. So, you know, you got to get over it. So, I mean, honestly, I don't think any voice could sound as bad as a clarinet when it first starts.
Right. But Right. But it's ironic because it's like the work helps you, the practice, the, the consistent practice, you gotta get over it because if you can, the work helps you discover who you are. Yes. And it, it gives you cookies in the jar, you know, where, like, You can, you can take from the jar whenever you're feeling empty.
You're like, well, I practiced. I discovered this about my voice. I'm getting better. You know, I, I know that I do this and I, and you can hear yourself becoming a more confident singer as you practice. Yes. But if you never do it and you never spend any time on yourself and you give up on yourself right away, then especially when those situations happen where you're getting that feedback, you have no cookies in the jar to be like, well, I can tell that this person is just toxic, they don't know what they're talking about, and I'm gonna have the confidence to Move on, which is a lot different than I guess they're right.
Maybe I should just stop singing, you know?
And I'll tell you, you know, even with as much mindset work as I've done, and as much kind of looking at my childhood and releasing a lot of fear and trauma from that, I've done all that work. Even I have still had that reaction. You know, when you get that kind of vague or weird criticism where you don't know what to do with it, I still have moments where, Oh my God, I must really suck.
I must be terrible. Maybe I should give up. Luckily, I know now that that's just a trick of the mind and it will go away even if it lasts a day or whatever, it'll go away. So now I just kind of let it be there. Okay. That's that again, that's just. Early childhood stuff, you know, and I think the only thing that stops people from practicing or from showing up for themselves is they have some kind of program running on the, the hard drive, hard drive of their mind that is like, that says that they, that they can't do it.
That they're not good enough because they got that somewhere from somebody growing up. And that's the thing that's replaying in the mind, that's stopping you. But if you didn't have that and you just thought, oh, I want to learn this task. If I do A plus B, I'll get C, just like you learn to tie your shoes, or drive a car, or whatever.
I mean, probably most people, when they learned to drive, they weren't like, I'm terrible at driving a car! I can't do it! I'm not talented at driving a car! Nobody does that. You just go, Okay, I have to learn the steps to driving a car, and I will do it. But people do it all the time with music. They think I'm just not good at this because the clarinet sounds bad when you first started, or you can't do something with your voice.
When you first try, you have to be willing to sound bad, but no, just like when you first learned how to drive a car, you couldn't do it either. The car was like all over the place and you weren't able to control it and all that. It's the same thing. It's not any different. It's just our culture has told us that there are people who are talented and there are people who are not.
It's not true. It's actually about skill development, you know, and if more people understood that you'd have a lot less people giving up, I think, too.
Yeah. And what I love about voice lessons, like, well, I, I know Kelly is dedicated and, you know, at this point, you know, she's got the cookies in the jar. She, I believe she would continue no matter what happened, you know, with her singing.
And, you know, I, I do work with a lot of singers who, You know, maybe we haven't been working together as long or this is why they take voice lessons, but it's like every week They'll come on their voice lesson and they'll be like, oh, yeah Yeah, I had a good week and then the mind stuff and then it's almost like well this happened and this happened and this happened This happened and I'm like, well, here we go.
Here's what we do. Let's do this And it's almost like, you know, Kelly's done a lot of this work and in our voice lessons You know, it looks a lot different. We get to collaborate in a way that kind of creates something together.
Yes.
And, and in other voice lessons, like a lot of people do it just because it's like that mind stuff that you were talking about, Kelly.
Yeah. Like, sometimes you just need another perspective to like flush it out and keep you going because Yes. So much mind stuff can gather in the period of a week, you know.
Oh, I feel like it's the single biggest thing that happens to anybody with any topic in their life is all that mind stuff. And most of us, let's face it.
I mean, most of us grew up with some kind of negative programming, you know, and, and it's just a matter of having to root that that's a whole other topic. I mean, that's like, I, you know, a very big endeavor, but I think that's the key to it really. I mean, you will succeed or fail based on your belief in your ability to do what you need to do.
And, um, That's it. That's it. Because like driving a car, if you could see singing as like driving a car, way more people would do it, you know, it's just that they're people are convinced that either good or they're bad. And they're constantly fighting that creeping fear that I might just be really bad at this as opposed to saying no.
Okay, there's this problem in my voice. Let's target it. Let's diagnose it. What's the problem now? Let's solve it That's all you got to do. But if you're up in your head going, ah, I sound bad. I'm so not good Oh, no, people aren't gonna like me when I sing that's all gonna just derail you on your journey
That's so true.
That's such good advice. Well, well, this has been awesome. I would love to hear about any projects that you have going on or where we could find you. Yes. Okay.
So what my next big goal is to really build up my YouTube channel. I love, love, love, love shooting music videos. And that kind of got stalled during the pandemic and I haven't sort of picked up the momentum again on that.
So I have decided that that's going to be my focus for the next year is getting as many music videos out there as possible, whether they, this, whether they're covers or my own original music, cause I have both, both ready to go. And when I do covers, I always do something weird or different with it. And I'm very excited about that.
So I've decided that I am going to do that even if I have to, if I, if I, don't always have the funds to do the big, big music production video. I can always shoot shorts and reels and, and do those. So I'm building my music channel, my YouTube channel. So I would love for people to come find me at Kelly Maglia on YouTube and yeah, I'm ready to go for the next year.
I'm going to start doing vocal covers and guitar covers as well. Cause I also, uh, study guitar weekly as well. So, um, I'm, I'm excited to have those guitar covers come out as well.
That's awesome, and I've seen a couple of Kelly's videos, and they're so good, and then you can get a chance to, like, look at her and be like, Wow, like, she does look like a opera rock singer, and she does sound like an opera rock singer, and it's, like, so perfect, and it's so inspiring for people who are feeling like their voice doesn't fit into a category.
It's like, make your own category, your
own category. I really feel like that's the name of the game. And this is not to diss singers who really do want to be in cover bands or tribute bands where they are imitating another singer. That is a perfectly legitimate thing to do. And it's a wonderful, and it's a skill in and of itself.
It's just not who I am. And what I want to do is create, and I want to push boundaries. And I want to. Maybe go where no one's gone before. That's my, feels like my life mission, you know? And, uh, and it doesn't have to be everybody's mission. So I don't want to make it sound like that, but that's what it is for me.
Yeah, and I think you hit on something super important. It's like, figure out, you know, who you are, what your voice is, and what you want to do, and how those things go together.
Yes. Because
sometimes if you're like, wow, like I'm an amazing Broadway style belter, like I, I really want to belt. But then you're like, oh, well, I, I really have.
no intention of like being in a musical. Like that sounds really boring, you know, like, right. Then your stuff doesn't line up. So you got to figure out why you're doing it, what you want to do
with it. So I think it's so important. And if you don't have that North star leading you, then you're, you're really kind of just stabbing around the stabbing in the dark.
Really? I mean, I think the sooner you can know why you sing and what you want to do, it's also going to make your. Voice lesson journey or your voice, your voice development journey, which to me is lifelong. It's just going to be lifelong because there's always new things. You can new heights that you can come to, you know?
So I think, but if you don't know what you're trying to do, then you're really not going in a focused way.
Yeah, that's awesome advice. Well, thank you so much for being here and doing this podcast. I hope that it was super inspiring for others and yeah I
hope so too. I really want to encourage everybody to To go for your dream.
I mean your dream you have your dream for a reason. It's not an accident, you know, and But our culture is very very good at saying Dreamers don't know what they're talking about You You have this dream, or you have this desire to sing for a reason, and you can do it. You just have to get the crap in your mind out of the way.
That is the thing that's stopping you the most.
You are stopping you. I love that. Well, thank you so much, Kelly, and I can't wait to see you in our voice lesson next. Yes!
I know! I'm excited too! I'm working on it.
Alright, well, bye! Bye.
Thanks, Tiffany.
